My Heartbeat Theme of Communication

The McConnells are the poster family for dysfunctional communication skills. Everyone would rather be tortured than have a conversation about anything remotely confrontational, and this causes them to find themselves in pretty deep water by the end of the book. James, a beacon of verbosity in this barren landscape of conflict-avoiders, is the only one who seems willing to address the issues of homosexuality, familial discord, and social awareness, which is why he is the natural person for Ellen to turn to when she finds herself confused about all of the above. My Heartbeat is all about her family's lack of desire to talk about things that are really important, and how their inability to do so can cause a whole lot of grief.

Questions About Communication

  1. Why is everyone so afraid to talk to each other? No, really—pick a few pairs of people and unpack just what keeps them from communicating freely.
  2. How would this book have been different if all the problems were out in the open?
  3. Does Mom purposefully avoid confronting Link, or is she just too distracted with her work?
  4. Is Ellen right to assume that Link won't talk to her about his problems?

Chew on This

Try on an opinion or two, start a debate, or play the devil’s advocate.

Because of his family situation, James has more reason to be antisocial and withdrawn than Link does.

The biggest difference between James and Link is that James talks to someone—his psychiatrist—about his problems, which is what makes him able to handle everything else.